Some words are better left unspoken
by Kismet76
Summary: Elissa Cousland is in love with Zevran, but she isn't sure that their physical relationship means the same for him, too. Rated M for a reason! Post-DA:O, spoilers, totally disregarding Awakenings. Reviews are appreciated!
1. Regrets, surprises

**Some words are better left unspoken**

The celebrations for the coronation went on for an entire month, during which people from all over Ferelden came to Denerim to see the King and, of course, the Hero who saved them all from the Blight.

Apart from the public audiences, Elissa spent most of her days in wearisome meetings with King Alistair's advisers or with Grey Wardens' emissaries from all over Thedas. She had to help solve food supplying problems as well as to explain tothe Wardens just _why_ both she _and_ Alistair were still alive after the Archdemon's defeat. It was a very hard month, much harder then she'd thought it would be, being the acclaimed Hero of Ferelden and all. She had hoped she could be free to reach Amaranthine sooner than that, but her new duties as royal counsellor _and_ Grey Wardens Commander required otherwise. Somehow she felt she was honouring her parents' memory by fulfilling her duties. Her education as an heir of the Cousland family helped her out with the decisions she was called to make and in dealing with the nobles on behalf of Alistair.

Poor Alistair. If this month had been hard for her, it had been almost unbearable for him. Unaccustomed as he was to royal politics, he needed her advice, and allowed only Elissa, Eamon and Teagan to support him in making his own decisions. Within a couple of weeks since the coronation, all of their companions had gone their separate ways. All but Zevran. Elissa found herself smiling when thinking of him. He had fought alongside her until the very end, always watching her back, and after the coronation he had agreed to go with her to Amaranthine and help rebuild the Grey Wardens.

After the last tedious meeting of the day she finally allowed herself to go back to her room. It was very late, she thought, and probably Zevran was in his room, sulking over the fact that she had preferred work over him. That wasn't the case, of course. She spent the days looking forward to the nights, because days were for Ferelden and the Grey Wardens, but nights were intended to be for her and Zevran. She was so tired on most nights that she just couldn't keep her eyes open, much less pay romantic attention to her lover. She usually fell asleep in his embrace, but lately Zevran had started feeling neglected, and had showed his obvious disappointment by deserting her room.

She had tried to convince him that the current situation was temporary and that soon they'd be able to travel to Amaranthine, but she was starting to have a hard time believing that herself. Things were settling down very slowly in Denerim, and Alistair was no less dependent on her guidance now than before. She sighed, walking along the castle corridors, wondering if she would find Zevran at all that night.

She went through the door of her apartments, entering the small sitting room, and then proceeded to her study. Both rooms showed no sign of Zevran's presence. With another sigh she entered her bedroom, only to find that the fire was merrily crackling and that the elf was apparently sound asleep in her bed. Her mood definitely improved at the sight of her lover, and Elissa shucked off her clothes and slid under the sheets as silently as she could.

"You could as well wear a full plate armor for all the noise you make, you know?" Zevran murmured.

"You're not asleep, I see" said Elissa with a smile, sliding further on, towards his form.

"I was asleep, until you decided to march in like a raging bronto. Luckily I never wasted my time trying to teach you to be stealthy."

_Grumpy, are we?_ Elissa thought.

"You are stealthy enough for both of us" Elissa conceded, all the while aligning her body to his and draping her left arm across his chest. "By the way, I didn't know you were in here."

When he didn't comment, she continued, pushing her face in the crook of his neck, smelling his scent. "I'm happy I found you in my room." _I need you,_ she thought, but she restrained herself from saying it out loud. For all his flirtatious comments, he was quite shy about his own true feelings towards her. She, on the contrary, felt like she had overexposed hers.

Once again she remembered her confession to him during the siege of Denerim. "I love you Zevran. I hope you know that."

He had cast down his eyes with a shy smile that was so unlike him. "Yes. Yes, I… I know that".

So much for professing one's love.

His answer had hurt her slightly. In the face of death she would have expected to hear something different from him. She knew that he cared about her, that he would have gladly given his life to save hers, but still… She was a woman after all, and she grew up as a teyrn's daughter, thinking that love meant romance and sweet nonsense, _not_ sex and dirty talking.

Well, not _only_ that.

Yet here she was, hopelessly in love with a man who had tried to kill her once, who had never told her what he felt about her, and whose life was in constant danger of being cut short by one of his former fellow assassins. Not exactly what her parents would have expected of her.

She was pulled off her thoughts by his voice, but she didn't catch the words, so she asked him to repeat.

"I asked how your day was", Zevran said. He opened his eyes just a fraction and looked at the fireplace, not at her. "I guess you are very tired, hm?"

"I'm tired, yes, but not _that_ tired. I'm really happy that you're here with me." With that Elissa lifted her head above his, smiling and watching him intently, searching his eyes for a reaction.

"Really? And exactly how happy are you, my dear?" he asked with his trademark smirk, crossing his arms under his head.

"Oh, very much." Elissa smiled broadly, all the while peeling back the sheets from his chest and slowly caressing his smooth skin with her left hand.

"Perhaps you are willing to demonstrate, yes?"

"Of course, lover."

They were resorting to their usual flirting, mutually pretending that nothing had happened. At least he was looking at her now, though with a lecherous look. Elissa felt that in that month she had done too little for their relationship, and she feared that Zevran could have lost some of his interest in her. She planned to regain whatever was lost between them, though. Zevran was in for some surprises.

Elissa's hand wandered on his chest, then on his abdomen. Zevran relaxed under her touch, smiling smugly as he enjoyed her attention. She kissed him slowly, savouring his full lips for a while, and when he started to respond, opening his mouth, she slid her lips on his cheek, then on his neck.

He chuckled softly at her actions. "You are in a mood for games, I see. Very well."

With that Zevran made a show of settling more comfortably against his pillow.

Elissa smiled against his skin, continuing her descent down his torso, stopping occasionally to lick and bite his flesh in the most delicious ways. When Zevran's hands reached down to touch her hair, which for once was not held back in her trademark ponytail, she caught his wrists, lifting herself up and pushing back his hands under his head. "No," she simply added with a tiny smile, giving no further explanation before descending again on his abdomen.

He watched her curiously now, intrigued by her newfound assertiveness. He was usually the one initiating their lovemaking, and she was more than glad to sit back and receive his attentions. After all, she had been a virgin when she first accepted his invitation for a massage, and she was still bashful when it came to sex and his expertise in the field.

Not that he minded at all. He himself liked being the teacher, and simply _loved_ to spoil her.

In their time together she had learnt a lot from him, though, and was now _very good_ at the particular act he guessed she was going to perform, so he sat back and kept his hands where she had put them.

Her mouth trailed slowly downwards, carefully avoiding the part of him that was now standing to attention, circling his most sensitive areas but never touching them directly. After a minute of this he hissed his disapproval, bucking instinctively towards her mouth. Elissa giggled softly and retreated a bit from him, watching his slightly flustered expression. Zevran groaned then relaxed on the bed, allowing her to continue her game.

Elissa was pleased with the reaction she elicited from the usually collected elf, it was a rare thing for him to show any slips in his control. She decided to reward him by giving him exactly what he wanted. She regarded him with a sly grin, so unusual of her, and he responded with a knowing smile. If that was a game, she really couldn't tell who was winning.

She started by licking the tip of his erection, sliding down the underside of him towards the base, and the Antivan let out a soft groan of approval. After a moment Elissa moved her hand to replace her mouth there and then squeezed just a little, feeling the hardness under the velvety skin. Retracing the path upwards with her tongue, Elissa reached the tip of his erection and circled it a couple of times before suddenly sinking all the way down.

Zevran managed to remain still this time, letting out just the smallest sigh. Her red hair, free of any restraints, came down in front of her and prevented him from seeing her face.

"Elissa," he called, his voice a restrained whisper. She raised her eyes and looked at him from under the curtain of hair. "If you mean this to be for my enjoyment, I should be free at least to watch the show, yes?" he asked with a grin.

She smiled and nodded, her mouth never leaving him, and he gathered her hair in his hand to move it to the back of her head, while she resumed her actions. She started sucking in earnest, knowing very well that this particular action, together with the display she was currently offering, would bring him to the brink of orgasm in no time. After a moment of this, he tightened his grasp in her hair and she moaned on him as a result, speeding up her movements just a little.

"You little minx," he breathed, suppressing a gasp, "what is your devious mind up to, tonight?"

Elissa laughed briefly at that, still engulfing him, and the reverberation on his erection made him shudder. He was quickly nearing his peak, and his hand grasped her hair, pulling a little. With that she started to move her tongue on the underside of him, licking the bulging vein there, still sliding up and down on him with her mouth _and_ sucking with gusto.

Another groan from him, this time a loud one, warned her of his upcoming release. She pushed on his hips to keep him in place, and he came undone with a long, throaty moan. She swallowed everything he spilled, then licked him clean before sliding back up his body and laying down next to him.

She sprinkled light kisses on his chest and shoulder before laying her head in the crook of his neck, smelling his scent once again. Spices, leather… and something so uniquely _Zevran_. He was still panting heavily, his eyes closed, when his left arm came up to her shoulder and pulled her more firmly against his side.

"You know, you didn't answer my question", Zevran said, his voice once again calm and collected.

"Which question?"

"What are you up to, tonight? Not that I mind a little treat, of course. But… I am curious." Zevran opened his eyes and watched her, an unreadable expression on his face.

"Must it be a carefully devised plan for me to do something nice for you?" Elissa answered, immediately regretting her choice of words. "I mean, I just wanted to do it, is all."

He looked at her as if he didn't believe a single word, but he shrugged and turned partially to lie on his side, facing her. "And glad I am that you did. Now, if you do not mind, I would like to reciprocate." He started to caress her breast with his right hand, when she flicked it away.

"Hm, no… I _do_ mind, actually" she said with a sly smile. "I'd rather you lie back and enjoy another kind of treat. Better still, come with me."


	2. The games we play

Elissa felt a surge of pride when she got up from the bed, seeing the surprised expression on Zevran's face. She went to the door to her study, hips swaying just so, while combing her mussed hair with her fingers.

"Would you mind lighting a lamp, Zev? It's dark in the study." _And I want you to see_, she added in her mind.

"Certainly, _dolcezza_."

She didn't look back to see if he was complying – she might have been uncertain about his feelings, but she knew what enticed him, and she was feeling… bold.

She entered her study and went to her desk, where she opened a large drawer to retrieve something. She hid it behind her back while she turned around to face him, blinking at the light shed by the lamp he was carrying.

He was stunning, as always, with coppery, smooth skin, flaxen hair and a seductive smile. He slowly approached the desk, all the while leering shamelessly at her form. She felt a blush rising to her cheeks and tried to ignore it, then cleared her throat to draw his eyes back to her face.

"Now, Zevran" she said, still grinning, "will you be a good boy and sit down while I give you your treat?" Elissa asked while she pointed at the chair in front of the desk. "Or, if you don't trust your self-control, I can tie you up." With that, she moved her hand in front of her, showing him a coil of silken rope.

"So, I have finally rubbed off on you, I see" he answered, amusement in his voice. "I guess I will have to prove myself to you then, even if you should know by now that I have quite the self-control." With that, he put down the lamp and sat on the chair, both hands resting comfortably on the armrests. Elissa wondered briefly at how he managed to look so relaxed without his clothes on. She was still very conscious of her naked state, even if he had seen her many times now.

"Any other rules I have to play by?" he asked smugly.

"Let me think…" she answered, tapping her index to her chin while pretending to consider his question. "No, just don't leave the chair unless I say so, else I'll have you bound to it in no time."

"I like these kind of threats, especially when they come from you, lover," he said. "I am quite sure, though, that in close quarters and without your sword and shield, you may have a hard time tying me up. Anyway," he added as an afterthought, "as I told you once, I like things that are beautiful and dangerous, and I also happen to like games." He smiled and made a little gesture with his head, to signal that he was ready to play.

Elissa silently reached behind herself to lean on the desk and slowly climbed on it, all the while facing him and watching his eyes. She felt herself blushing furiously as she lifted her knees and put her heels on the edge of the desk, then slowly spread her legs open in front of him. She had never done anything like this before, but looking at his lustful eyes she felt unexpectedly bold and… powerful. Maybe this was what he felt like, when he was with her. It was quite an intoxicating feeling, and she could understand why he liked so much to be in control.

He was watching her, silent and still on the chair. No flirting, not even dirty talk. _So you are speechless, for once_, she thought, smiling to herself.

Emboldened, she moved her right hand between her legs and her left to her breast, and started to touch herself in the way she liked most. She closed her eyes, partly because her own motions were distracting her and partly because she simply had to look away from his intense gaze.

She gave in to the sensations for some time, but opened her eyes again when she heard a sigh from him. Elissa raised her head from the desk and saw him stroking himself, and their eyes locked again. Zevran had regained his composure, relaxing against the chair, and was now smirking at her, challenging her. "You did not say I could not move," he explained slowly arching a brow, "and I am still on the chair, as you can see."

Unexpectedly, she smiled and nodded. She had anticipated this kind of reaction from him and was ready to make her next move.

Elissa languidly slid down from the desk, took a step forward and, lowering her face to his, she kissed him. Her tongue darted out to lick his lower lip, coaxing him to open up his mouth, and the kiss deepened almost instantly. Elissa broke away after a moment only to slide a finger from her right hand between his lips, to let him taste her. He groaned in response, sucking at her finger and closing his eyes briefly, never stopping his motion with his hand.

Hers was a carefully devised plan, after all.

Elissa let him suck her finger a little longer, then pulled away and went back to the desk. He watched with added interest when she turned around, facing the desk, and leaned her upper torso and left arm upon the wooden surface, bending her body so that her rear end was in front of him, completely exposed yet out of reach, before returning her right hand to its previous task between her legs.

Zevran took a deep, broken breath and let out a low chuckle. "It seems you know all my weaknesses by now." Elissa responded with a moan, and immediately felt his hands on her hips. "All right, lover, I yield to your arts. You win this game," he whispered hotly in her ear just as he entered her in one swift motion.

Elissa could only moan again, louder, when he slid all the way in and bit her at the base of her neck. He stood still for a moment, breathing in her scent and savouring her wet heat.

She smiled at him over her shoulder, "Well, I learnt from a master."

Later that night the two lovers laid in bed, spent, the fireplace shedding a dim light on the room and on their naked forms. They were still catching their breath, their legs entwined and her body still on top of his, when Zevran spoke. "The third time's the charm, I guess."

"What…?"

"Clearly, I am not referring to our lovemaking, pet," Zevran said with a grin, folding his right arm under his head, while his left one caressed the small of her back. "I would be ashamed if my endurance was so limited. No, I am talking about the question I asked you before. As I said, I like games, especially when I lose to beautiful women like you, but I sense there is something you are not telling me, and I would like to know what it is. So I am asking you again, my dear Warden, what are you up to, tonight?"

He slowly combed her long hair with his fingers, waiting for her answer.

After a long moment, she pushed her face in the crook of his neck, hiding her face before answering softly. "I wanted to do something special, I wanted this night to be… different. Some kind of surprise, I think."

"And surprise me you did," he said, chuckling. "Actually, I am a little scared. Where is Lady Elissa Cousland and what have you done with her?"

She let out a small laugh and slapped him lightly on the shoulder, then lifted her head from his chest to look him in the eyes. "Zevran, can we talk?"

He raised a brow. "You are suddenly so serious, my sweet, that I am almost afraid of what you could tell me. But of course, we can talk."

Elissa took a deep breath to steady herself before speaking. "During the siege…" _No, wait, this isn't what I wanted to say_, she thought, dropping her head against his chest once more.

"… I mean, I've been so busy lately, I know we haven't seen each other as much as we… Well, not as much as I wanted to… So, well… I thought you might…"

_Great, I'm stuttering now_, she thought while a blush started creeping up her face. She was making a fool of herself, and decided to shut up before doing any more damage.

She was startled out of her silence by Zevran's fingers on her cheek, caressing her as he spoke. "So, you think you neglected me during the last weeks, and you wanted to make it up to me?"

"Something like that, yes."

"Hm, I see. And what about the siege?"

_Busted_, she thought. "Ah, that was… nothing, really."

"Nothing, you say?" His fingers slid from her cheek to her chin, lifting her face so that he could see her eyes. She blushed even more under his scrutiny, because she felt that he knew exactly why she had mentioned the siege. Those three damned words she had said out loud when she thought they were going to die.

"All right," he continued with a strange smile after a moment. "And fear not, my lady, because you are completely forgiven. I know you have to fulfil your duty towards this nation, and I admit I was acting rather childishly. So, everything is fine now, yes?"

Elissa was relieved and disappointed at the same time. Was he avoiding the subject? Maybe he didn't want to embarrass her, or he simply preferred to ignore the incident and keep their relationship just as it was. She felt stupid and ignorant, and she didn't know how to answer, so she simply kissed him, hoping to convey her feelings and thoughts to him.

Zevran responded to her kiss with some hesitation, and when she pulled away he tucked her head under his chin and resumed combing her hair with his fingers, in silence.

Sleep, for both of them, didn't come for a long time.


	3. Sparring partner

Elissa was sitting at her desk, reading a letter from some minor noblewoman who was asking for an audience with the Hero of Ferelden. She had been reading that letter for almost an hour without really understanding any of it. Her mind was constantly wandering to a totally different subject, so she put the letter back upon the stack of documents she had yet to read and leant back against the chair with a sigh.

She hadn't sorted out the situation with Zevran yet. Now, more than ever, she didn't know where she stood.

She had been raised as a noble; hence she had expected to be guided by her parents towards an appropriate marriage with a man of similar standing. She knew that love would probably not be involved in such a union, and that maybe, if she was lucky, some measure of affection would have come over time.

Nothing had prepared her for her current situation. She sighed and rose from her chair, hoping that a stroll in the royal gardens would clear her head. She was never going to get anything done in that state, anyway.

Elissa was halfway to the door when she heard someone knocking. "Elissa, it's me."

_Alistair_, she thought with a frown. _Has something happened?_

"Come in." She didn't bother calling him "Your Majesty". Having seen someone trying to wash away darkspawn blood from their very underclothes had this kind of effect on protocol.

Alistair opened the door to her study and went in, a crooked smile on his face. "Am I interrupting anything?"

Elissa suddenly blushed, remembering the activities that her desk had witnessed the night before.

"Not at all; I was only going through some requests. I don't know why some people think that I can grant them special favours on behalf of the Crown," she said, gesturing angrily at the pile of letters. "Why don't they appeal to _you_? I mean, I'm not the bloody Queen of Ferelden!"

She kicked herself mentally for her _extremely_ poor choice of words. She was tired and confused, blaming Zevran for that, but she should have known better.

Things were still somewhat unresolved between her and Alistair since she had chosen Zevran over him. It happened months ago, and until then she and Alistair had shared just a single kiss over that Maker-forsaken rose. They had never truly committed to one another, but she _had_ definitely dumped him, and he had resented it quite a bit at the time.

"Well, what brings you here, anyway?" she said nonchalantly, trying to change the subject before he could notice her slip.

"You know," Alistair said with a sad smile, "you could very well be. The Queen of Ferelden, I mean. You'd probably be doing a much better job ruling than I am."

She froze for a second, then forced herself to relax and smile.

"Alistair, you're doing a fine job. You're still learning, but you have the best advisors and I'm sure…"

"I know, I know. You don't need to go there again. You've made me King, and I don't think I can simply return the crown, now. I'm just saying that, since you got me into this trouble, it'd be only fair if you shared the burden." He looked sad, but he was smiling warmly at her.

"Alistair," she said, sighing, "you know I couldn't have done that."

"Well, maybe it wouldn't have been that bad. We're friends, and we used to be… more than that, after all... it could have worked." He took a step towards Elissa, and she found herself unconsciously retreating against her desk.

Alistair saw her stepping backwards and stopped in his tracks, rubbing a hand on his face. "I'm sorry Elissa, I was out of line. I actually came here to ask you to spar with me. I need some… time off."

She was surprised by his request. Since the end of the Blight she hadn't touched a weapon, and she supposed he hadn't either. That meant that they weren't probably in their best shape and could use some exercise. It could help them relieve some stress, too.

"All right, I think I need it too."

They left her study and walked in silence to the armoury.

Alistair spoke first, examining the wooden training swords. "So, what's going on?"

"Huh?"

"Why do you need some time off? You can imagine why I do. Ruling a country and all that stuff. What about you?"

"I… just need to clear my head a bit."

Alistair smiled at her, seeing through her attempt to sidestep his question. "Really? You seem pretty comfortable in your role as a counsellor to the crown, so I take it ruling is not your problem. What's bothering you?"

Elissa was instantly reminded why she and Alistair had connected immediately when they first met. He could read her so easily, it was almost scary sometimes. He was her best friend, after all.

She sighed and leant on an arms rack, avoiding his eyes. "I… I don't think you'll want to hear this. It's about Zev."

He went still for a moment, then resumed his fumbling with the swords, amusement laced in his words. "Don't worry. We _are_ friends. I can take it… I hope."

Elissa grabbed a wooden sword and moved it around slowly, as though to study its balance.

"To put it simply, I don't understand him."

Alistair let out a hearty laugh.

"Hey!" Elissa gave him a nasty look, and he raised his hands in a gesture of peace.

"Sorry! I'm sorry Elissa, it's not funny, I know!" He said, smiling still. "Okay, I'm not laughing. Here. Tell me."

She glared at him. "It's serious, you know?"

"I'm sorry Elissa, really, I am. I wasn't laughing at you, anyway." He bumped his shoulder against hers. "Come on, let's go to the courtyard. We were going to spar, weren't we? You can talk as we walk."

She fell into step beside him, and they ambled through the corridors of the castle.

Elissa stated with a sigh. "When we met him I thought he was so uncomplicated. He stated clearly what he wanted from us… from me. Freedom from the Crows. A second chance. A dalliance, maybe."

"Hm," was Alistair's only comment.

"Then we… _I_ came to know him better, and I found out there were so many more layers to him. There was hurt, loneliness… and guilt. He's never been very open about his feelings, but I sensed that there was something in his past… Something terrible, worse than anything else that has been done to him. He told me about his past… bits of it, and some of them were pretty awful. Anyway, I have come to care for him. I have… given up quite a lot for him."

Elissa couldn't help but blush and lower her eyes to the ground, to hide her face from Alistair.

"The problem is that I don't understand what goes through his head. You know, about me."

Alistair nodded once. "Do you love him?"

Elissa swallowed visibly. "Yes."

"And you have told him so." It wasn't a question.

"Yes. At the city gates, during the siege. I thought we could die…"

"And what did he say to you?"

"… He said that he knew that."

"That's it? That's all he said?" Alistair's voice rose a bit in surprise. Or anger, maybe.

"Alistair, you know how he is. He smiled, and held me, and kissed me…" Elissa found herself defending Zevran, in spite of her own feelings. "That was his way to tell me what he felt…"

"Then why are you troubled?" Alistair had stopped in his tracks, and looked definitely angry. "Why are telling me this?"

Elissa felt a pang in her chest and stopped altogether. She knew Alistair was right. She wouldn't have brought it up if she were so sure about her lover's feelings.

Silence stretched between them for long moment.

"I'm sorry, Elissa," Alistair said then, his voice controlled again. "It didn't come out quite right."

"You have nothing to be sorry about. It's true, I shouldn't be troubled. And _I_ am sorry, I shouldn't have complained about it to you. I'm simply… confused." She turned to him, smiling sadly. "That's why I agreed to spar, Alistair. As I said, I really need to clear my head."

"Yes." He smiled in return. "Yes, of course. The courtyard is behind that corner. I guess that's what best friends are for, huh? You know, getting beaten every once in a while to help relieve your stress." He was grinning now, back to his usual jokes.

She couldn't help but laugh and hug him. "Thank you, Alistair."

"I know, I know. I'm the best."


	4. Scared, loved

"_Maker_! You _do_ know I was joking when I said you could beat me up to relieve your stress, right?" Alistair said, jabbing at his broken lip with a cloth while leaving the courtyard.

"Well, if you weren't up to it," Elissa chuckled, "you shouldn't have offered in the first place! You're such a big baby!"

He stared at her wordlessly for a moment, then made his best "puppy-dog eyes" at her. "The least you could do is kiss it and make it better!"

She instantly blushed, searching her mind for a playful answer.

"Now _that_ I would like to see." Zevran's voice interrupted her thoughts. "Better yet, I would like to _join_."

Alistair froze on the spot, suddenly breaking into a cold sweat. Elissa turned around to look at Zevran, who had snuck up on them, and saw him sporting a strange smile. He put an arm around Alistair's shoulders, pursing his lips as though about to kiss the ex-templar, and Alistair quickly sidestepped and ran away mumbling something about elven promiscuity.

Zevran laughed hard, and Elissa suppressed a sigh of relief. "Poor Alistair! Did you _really_ have to do it?"

"Well of course, my dear," he answered with a sly smile. "I have a reputation to maintain, after all." Zevran put an arm around her waist and leaned in to kiss her ear. "So, why did you beat him up? What could he possibly have done to deserve such a treatment? Hmm… did he threaten your virtue, maybe?"

"Zev, you know very well I have no remaining _virtue_ to speak of…"

"Oh, but this is _so_ not true… and you make it sound like a most exciting challenge, little one…" Elissa blinked a couple of times, trying to process the hidden meaning of his words, while he leered at her.

"And the way you blush, so _lovely_… But I won't be distracted. Well, not right _now_." He looked at the wooden sword she still held in her hand. "Why the swords, then? Were you training?"

"Just a little exercise," she shrugged, "to take our minds off political issues."

"I could have helped you, too." He sounded almost sad. "Besides, I could use some exercise with a sword."

Elissa looked at him with a smile, expecting some bad wordplay about _swords_ or another kind of _exercise_, but nothing came. _What, no crude jokes?_ She thought in bewilderment.

"Well, it was Alistair who came to me offering a sparring match. And besides, you would have been at a disadvantage, fighting with a wooden sword against me." Her smile became a nasty grin. "No daggers in the back, no poisons… I don't see how you could stand a chance."

He didn't respond to her obvious teasing, simply shrugging instead. "You're probably right", he said, letting go of her. "I need to run an errand in the market now. We will meet again after dinner, yes?"

She nodded, slightly baffled, and he left for the palace gates. While she watched him go she briefly considered calling him back to ask him what was wrong, or why did he have to go to the market. She opened up her mouth to do just so, then she stopped.

_That's none of your business, girl_, she told herself. _If he wants to tell you, he will. _

So she closed her mouth and watched him walking away, almost hoping he'd turn around with a bright smile on his face.

He didn't.

Later that night she left the umpteenth boring meeting with Ferelden nobility and went to the kitchens to get some food. The maids took some convincing, but soon she was allowed to take the food tray to her room by herself.

She entered her quarters and put the tray on the small table of her sitting room, then moved to her sleeping room. She took off her boots and coat, and since the place was a bit dark, she walked towards the fireplace. As soon as she bent to rekindle the fire she felt a movement behind her.

She tried to react, but a strong hand grasped her right wrist, pulling it behind her back, and a blade was pushed on her throat, right above her pulse point. She gasped and went still.

"You should be more careful, Gray Warden."

_Zevran_! She instantly relaxed against him, releasing a deep breath, but he continued before she could speak. "I am told that there is a rich contract upon your life, now," he whispered, a cold note in his voice. "I believe a group of Crows are on their way to Ferelden as we speak."

She blinked in the darkness of her room as she registered his words and tried to form a coherent thought. _No, who… What? But I…_

Again, he spoke before she could utter a word. "But you feel safe here, anyway, yes? _Here_, in the King's palace, protected within its walls, guarded by his soldiers. And yet here I am, with a knife at your throat. _Tsk_, my dear, what should I do with you?"

She swallowed and found her voice again. She steadied herself, trying not to give away her sudden fear. "Zevran, what kind of joke is this? Stop it!"

"Or what?" He chuckled darkly. "I could take your life right now." The blade at her neck slid slowly downwards, stopping at the first button of her shirt. With a flick of his wrist, it popped away, falling soundlessly to the ground.

Her breathing hitched in her throat, a rush of adrenaline coursing through her system. "Zevran, stop it right now, it's not funny!"

"Oh? It is not supposed to be funny, dear Warden. You should be scared by now. In fact, you should be begging for mercy."

"_What_? Let me go!" Her patience wore out, and she started to struggle against his hands, but he tightened his grasp and set the blade firmly back against her pulse point, pressing until she stopped thrashing.

"If I completed this job now," he growled, "I could immediately re-enter the ranks of the Crows, _untouched_. I could even raise my position by achieving such a goal. The Crow who killed the Hero of Ferelden. Think about it." He pressed against her even more, letting her feel his breath on her neck. His lips were against her ear when he spoke again. "How lucky you are that I am _not_ going to do just that."

A moment of silence followed, as he popped another button with his knife, then another, slowly trailing the cold blade upon her skin. She couldn't bring herself to move yet, or to _breathe_, even. After what seemed an eternity, her shirt hung open and she stood there, rooted to the ground, her left hand trembling at her side. She had never felt so helpless in his arms.

"So, pet, I am being very generous, yes?" The flat of the blade ran across her now bare chest to her abdomen, slowly circling her navel. He was clearly waiting for an answer.

Elissa breathed in slowly, trying to calm down and think of something coherent to say. "Zevran, I don't know what you're talking about. Why are you doing this? Why are you... trying to scare me?" Her words came out in a whisper. She _was_ scared.

The pressure on her bent arm relented a bit, but his hold on her wrist remained steely. "Because…" he said, slowly moving the blade downwards, "my dear, today I realized that you are not scared _enough_." The blade was now testing the sash that held up her breeches. "Given your position you should be much more careful, to begin with. Anyone with a little skill could have entered this room and put a knife to your throat." With a small amount of pressure the fabric of the sash gave way.

"Besides, has anyone ever told you that consorting with assassins can be dangerous?" A meaningful bite at her earlobe made her shudder. "You seem to forget that I_ am_ an assassin, and a rather skilled one, at that. You should not underestimate me." He softly squeezed her wrist against her back before he let go of it, moving his hand to her front, at the hem of her breeches. She felt strangely compelled to keep her arm behind her back and be still.

The blade now rested on the lowest part of the laces that held her breeches closed, and was pointed upwards. "I believe that you need to be reminded of this particular fact." The sharp blade was suddenly pushed up, slicing through the laces in one swift motion.

"And to ensure that the notion sticks in your mind, I think it should be accompanied by a demonstration." With that, he pushed down her breeches and underclothes together, letting them pool by her feet. "Keep the shirt on. Get on the bed."

Elissa shuddered at his commanding words. For a moment she thought of turning around and punching him for all she was worth, for scaring her like that. Instead she took a deep breath, steadying herself, and walked slowly to the bed, feeling his eyes on her at every step.

_I shouldn't do this. He already has so much power over me,_ she thought. _And why the act? Is this about the Crows? _She smiled bitterly at the last thought. _Is he worried about me, or himself?_

She shook her head even as she climbed onto the bed and kneeled by the headboard. _No, I know him better than that. Still, I feel there's something else…_

She was yanked out of her thoughts by his hand, grabbing her by the nape of her neck and turning her head toward him. He was naked, and she got just a glimpse of him – _as stunning as ever_ – before he leaned in and kissed her slowly and deeply. Despite her irritation she responded immediately, closing her eyes and moaning against his mouth. His hand then went between her legs, lightly touching her folds, while the other pressed lightly the flat of his blade on her thigh. "My, my, Elissa," he whispered. "So wet already, just by the cold kiss of my knife?" She shuddered involuntarily and leaned in to kiss him again and possibly hide from his scrutiny.

He let her kiss him for a moment, than backed away and brought up his wet fingers, brushing them against her lips. Elissa could smell herself, mixed with a faint trace of cinnamon, and licked tentatively at his middle finger. He groaned and pushed it inside her mouth. Closing her eyes, she ran her tongue all around his finger until she had cleaned it of her juices. When she started to suck on it, he hissed and took it out of her mouth.

The knife momentarily forgotten, he ran his hands from her neck to her shoulders and arms, dragging her shirt along until it fell around her kneeling form. He started nibbling and biting at her neck while pushing her down on her back, and in a few moments she was arching under him, her arms languidly spread above her head as he fondled her breasts with his mouth.

A minute later, her mind registered through the lust that clouded her mind that her wrists were tangled – no, _tied_ – in her shirt. And her shirt was somehow tied to the bedpost. She opened her eyes, slightly alarmed, and saw a smirk on Zevran's face.

"Sleight of hand," he said pointing to her hands with his chin. "Most useful to an assassin. I am also skilled with poisons and drugs." He licked a path from her breast to her belly, while his hands rested on her hips. "Do you know there are poisons that I can ingest which would be harmless to me and yet be already killing you as we speak?" She shivered slightly at the notion, but her hips rose wantonly in anticipation.

"I know my way around knives, as you know." He bit the soft flesh, causing her to gasp and buck towards him. "Ah, and of course I am a master of seduction. I can keep a partner on the edge for hours," he said, tracing his tongue back up her hip to her navel. "Even more than one partner at a time, actually."

At this, she blinked. _What?_

"But this is an interesting thought for another occasion, yes? For now, pet, we will focus on the challenge you threw this morning."

"Wha-what challenge?" she gasped.

"The one about your _virtues_, of course. _Tsk_, such innocence, little one. There are so many things that you haven't experienced yet, so many _firsts_. It would be only fair of me to let you have a taste of them before someone else does, and in a less pleasurable way, I might add. If you were kidnapped by a Master Crow, for example, he would not kill you immediately, no. He would take his time, enjoy your company at length."

He took her by the hips and turned her around quickly, laying her on her belly. "A Master Crow would probably tie you up to prevent you from struggling _too much_, since you have quite a reputation as a warrior, and he would certainly drug you, to make you more… _pliant_." He stretched out over her, his skin sliding on hers, warm and smooth, until she could feel his breath on her ear.

"He would have his way with you for a time, then he would give you over to the Crows for his reward." She winced at the thought. "He would commit himself to breaking you, by fair means or foul, and – believe me – he would succeed."

At this, Elissa felt a surge of anger. During the Blight she had lost almost everything, _everyone_ she cared for; she had faced more horror and death than anyone her age – hell, anyone _at all_ – should have had, and yet she stood still. Hurt, yes, but _never_ broken. Full of indignation, she gathered all her strength and rolled on her side, trying to shake him off of her. He slid only partially on the bed, but recovered swiftly, straddling her legs and pushing her back down on the bed.

"This is futile, pet," he said, grabbing a fistful of the hairat her nape and pulling her head back up at a straining angle, making her gasp. "You are at my mercy." He pushed her head back into the beddings, his grasp on her hair unrelenting, and growled a warning in her ear. "Do not resist me, _piccola_, or you might regret it. Believe me, you do not want to meet Master Arainai."

She whimpered, feeling a hot flare burn right through her center, lust laced with fear. Again, despite her irritation, her body was all too willing to give in. Slowly she breathed in, breathed out, and decided to go along with her body.

With her mouth pushed against the coverlet she could only moan in answer, but she rocked back against his hips, slowly, in the most enticing way she could think of. _I'm not resisting. I yield._

He chuckled, and his fingers loosened a bit. "Very good, pet. Now you will behave properly, yes?" She nodded in agreement. He let go of her hair and rose from her body, then he kneeled beside her, slapping her round bottom for good measure. She yelped and he laughed, caressing the soft flesh with a loving gesture. "There is so much I can teach you, _piccola_. But first we need to get past the issue of your _punishment_."

"W-what?" she managed to squeak.

"You heard me," he said, grabbing her by the hips and lying her across his legs, with her bottom in the air. "You have been a very naughty girl." He slapped her a little harder, eliciting another yelp from her, then caressed the reddening flesh.

"But I didn't…"

"Oh, _sì_, you did. When I met you and Alistair this morning you were both blushing and talking of kisses, remember? This, in my book, is _flirting_."

_Slap_.

"Ow! Zevran, stop!"

"Oh, I do not think so. First of all, you deserve at least a couple more. You will not fool around with him – not without _inviting me, _too – is that clear?"

She looked back at him in disbelief, unable to give an answer.

_Slap_.

"Ow! Stop! That hurts!"

"I asked you a question: _is that clear_?"

"Yes, yes it is! Now stop!"

"Come now, where are your manners, my Lady?"

"… Stop, please?"

"That's better. Just try and sound convincing, now."

_Slap_.

"_Please_! Zevran, _stop_!"

"Now that is a beginning. Not very fervent yet, but still… Ah, you should see yourself, _piccola_. Flushed all over, so lovely, and…" He caressed her bottom again, smiling as he spoke, and slid a finger downwards until it brushed against her folds. "So wet, again! I think you like it, yes?"

She couldn't speak. She couldn't even look at him. She squirmed, trying to remove his finger, but he simply slapped her again, laughing, so she hid her face in the beddings and went still.

"Oh? You need not be ashamed of your reaction, _piccola_: it is only natural. Besides, it is a good thing that you are so very sensitive." His finger returned between her legs, gliding lower, until it barely brushed her nub. She nearly jumped off his legs, moaning. She had _never_ felt so aroused.

He groaned at her reaction and moved away from under her. "On your knees," he ordered, a touch of coldness back in his voice. She complied, rubbing her thighs together while rising on her knees, the evidence of her excitement gushing suddenly down her legs because of the change of position.

He untied her wrists and went behind her, pulling her up against his chest until she was flush with him, her knees just outside his. His left hand went to her neck, holding her throat loosely but still in a slightly threatening way, while he nibbled on her right shoulder. "Tell me what you want."

She shuddered and pushed back her hips, and he chuckled. "You should have overcome your shyness by now, yes? Here, let me help you."

His right hand went between her legs, his touch now much firmer than before, making her moan and squirm in no time. "Is this what you want, _piccola_?"

_It is, but it isn't enough_, Elissa thought as she moaned and leaned her head back on his shoulder. Grabbing his wrist, she pushed his hand more firmly against herself and tried, at the same time, to grind against his hardness.

His hand inside her went still. "Tell me what you want, _piccola_, or I will tie you up again and you will not be able to satisfy your need for the rest of the night."

She whimpered again before speaking softly. "You… I want you."

"Where do you want me, _piccola_?"

"Inside… inside of me. Please, Zev!"

"Ah, _piccola mia, tutto quello che vuoi_…" He guided her shoulders back down on the bed and entered her from behind, slowly, savouring her tight wetness. When he was fully inside her he stopped, shuddering. "_Se solo sapessi cosa mi fai_…"

"Ah, Zev, please!" She rolled her hips against his, urging him to move. He complied, sliding almost all the way out and pushing forward again, setting a slow, torturous pace. She moaned and tried to get him to move faster, but he simply chuckled and held her hips in place more firmly.

"You only have to ask, _piccola_. Come now, tell me what you need." His voice, low and sultry, made her shudder, tightening the knot inside of her.

"Zevran, please, I can't… _Ah!_ Faster…"

"With pleasure, my sweet."

He picked up his pace and she found herself balling her fists into the coverlet under her, her body thrumming with need and pleasure, until his hand reached under her and flicked her nub _just so_, and she was lost.

She came with a harsh cry, and he curled himself over her back, following her almost immediately. She crumpled down under his weight, and for a long moment neither of them could speak or move.

"Are you alright, my sweet?" Zevran's voice gave away his concern as he moved away from her to lie on his side.

"Hmm," she nodded, turning around to face him. "Zevran," she said, pushing away a lock of flaxen hair from his eyes, "will you tell me now what was all that about?"

"… We will talk in the morning. Let us sleep now." He gathered her to him, tucking her head under his chin. "Just know that you are safe here, with me."

A/N: I think some translations from Antivan are in order!

Being Italian has its perks!

_Piccola_ means "little one".

_Piccola mia, tutto quello che vuoi _means "Little one, anything you want".

_Se solo sapessi cosa mi fai_ means "If you only knew what you do to me".


	5. Tread softly

Elissa awoke when the first rays of sun hit her side of the bed. She blinked a couple of times, feeling sleepy still, and turned on her side, trying to retreat from the invading sunlight. As she moved, she became aware of a warm hand on her belly, and, raising her eyes, she saw Zevran's face a breath away from hers.

He was asleep. She studied him, intrigued: he always woke up before her, whether they were in her tent or in a tavern room, so it was a rare opportunity for Elissa to be able to observe him in his sleep. He was beautiful. His braids had come undone during the night, and his hair was framing his elegant features. He was as peaceful and relaxed as she had ever seen him, and while she watched him he stirred slowly, rubbing his cheek into the soft pillow.

She sighed softly._ Maker, I__'__ve fallen for him, and I__'__ve fallen _hard_. What a fool I am!_

Before leaving for Orlais, Leliana told her that her feelings were so apparent, everyone in their rag-tag party had figured them out, long before the battle with the Archdemon.She smiled, thinking about Sten and his scowl.

Leliana also advised her to be careful with Zevran, because while he most assuredly liked to have _fun_, he also probably didn't want anything more than that.

And that was, more or less, what he told her on the night they first slept together. They didn't sleep at all, but they talked for some time after _the deed_. When it came to _him_ not asking more of _her_ than she was willing to give, she had the horrible sensation that the conversation wasn't going in the right direction. Then he said something about being next on guard duty and began to get dressed. "Thank you for the lovely evening, my Grey Warden." He kissed her and went out in a blink.

It had been her first time, and she almost cried, that night.

Almost.

She had been through much worst, after all, and that single disappointment wasn't worth her tears. They talked again in the morning, and they shared a tent again the following night. They talked more, they laughed together, and they made love again.

She settled for that strange kind of relationship, made of a mix of lurid comments and caring gestures, and though it was supposed to be non-committal, at least on his part, Zevran had been quite… monogamous for months now.

When confronted with almost-certain-death-by-Archdemon, she opened her heart and declared her love to him, receiving a mild "I know" in return.

_I chose this path, _she said to herself, sighing again_. I have no right to complain. I knew the rules for this game. Besides, Zevran is still here with me, and this must mean something after all._

Her eyes ran again over his face, his eyes, his nose. She was watching his lips when he started talking. "Hmm. What is it my dear Warden? My looks are so captivating that you stare at me in my sleep?"

Elissa blushed, surprised. He hadn't opened his eyes yet.

"You are not bad yourself, you know?" He added, chuckling and opening his amber eyes, pointedly leering at her form under the thin sheet.

"I wasn't staring," she said, turning away from him to hide her blush. "I was just thinking."

"Thinking about what, I wonder?" He pushed himself behind her, encircling her waist with an arm and nuzzling her neck. He was only slightly taller than her, so they spooned perfectly.

She felt suddenly angry at him. "If you must know, I was wondering why are you still here."

"Hmm, let me think. I am here because, after having thoroughly ravished you last night, I fell asleep in your bed."

"Zev, you know what I mean," she said, her tone a bit harsh.

"To be honest, my dear," he said, laying small kisses along her shoulder to her neck, apparently untouched by her seriousness, "I absolutely do not know. I have the suspicion, though, that you will enlighten me very soon."

She tried to keep calm and to pick the right words. "Until last night, I thought that being here with me was becoming kind of boring for you, but now, after what you told me about the Crows, I'm starting to think that things here are becoming a little _too_ interesting, even for you. So I'm wondering why, exactly, you are still here."

Her words were met by a strange silence, so she felt compelled to say something else, with the lightest tone she could muster. "Unless, of course, you've fallen for my charms." _Stupidstupidstupid!_

He bellowed with laughter then, rolling on his back and away from her. "My dear Warden, sometimes I forget that you are not only the Hero of Ferelden, and probably one of the best fighters of this country, but that you are also a _girl_."

She turned around then, slightly outraged, and frowned at him. "And what would you mean by that?"

"Oh, nothing at all." He pulled her by the waist until she was flush with him. "Now tell, my dear, are there any chances we engage in a more pleasant kind of activity right now?" She scowled at him. "No? Then I will answer your question after I have had a proper breakfast, if you don't mind." He rolled away and off the bed, and began getting dressed.

Elissa was speechless. She wanted to get him to answer, but didn't want to seem too preoccupied about it. In a fit of frustration, she got up and went to her wardrobe, where she chose a fresh tunic and a new pair breeches. She made a point of ignoring him as he smirked at her, since he was obviously remembering _how_ her clothes had come off the previous night.

When she was dressed, she called a servant and ordered breakfast to be brought to her sitting room.

"So eager to know the answer, my dear?" he purred in her ear as soon as she closed the door.

"We should be speaking of the Crows." She moved away from him, trying to look unaffected. "What do you know, exactly?"

He took a slightly deeper breath and went to sit on an armchair in front of her desk, stretching his legs and crossing the ankles. "I told you I knew someone from the Crows here in Denerim, yes?" Elissa nodded, leaning on her desk, right in front of him. "After the Coronation, he left his usual location. I had to track him down, and it was quite a task, all things considered."

She knew what he was talking about. Denerim was undergoing reconstruction after the great battle against the darkspawn, but a lot of buildings were still in ruin, and a large part of the population, the poorer one, was struggling to find a decent place to live in. This had created further problems, such as a shift in the power balance amongst the city criminals. Elissa knew perfectly well that every capitol city had its share of cutthroats wars, but in the days immediately following the coronation there had been a new bloodshed in Denerim.

"When I found him I had to… convince him that he had better talk to me. He was scared, you see, and rightly so. He cannot return to Antiva for the time being, and he has recently lost much of his connections and money, so he understands he has to be… nice to me." A cold grin spread across his beautiful face. _An assassin, indeed._

Elissa suppressed a shiver, not really wanting to think about the details of that particular encounter. She didn't want to know exactly how _vicious_ Zevran could be. "So, what did he tell you?"

"His last contact with the Crows dates back to a couple of days before the siege. He received a letter from Master Lorenzo, one of the most powerful Crow Masters. He burnt the letter right after reading it, obviously, but he remembers its contents quite well. To put it simply, the Crows accepted a new contract on your life."

Elissa crossed her arms in front of her, feeling suddenly cold in her light cotton tunic. "That is all? No other information? Who pays for the contract?"

"The letter reported only that a large party of Crows was on its way to Ferelden, and this is… most unusual. Crows do not work in groups, we… _they_ move in parties of two, three people at most, when they do not work alone. My informant does not know exactly how many Crows are to be expected, but he was quite surprised by this piece of news, as well. About the client, usually only the Crow members directly involved know his or her identity."

Elissa took a deep breath and nodded pragmatically. "So, what do you suggest?"

Zevran looked away before speaking. "I am quite surprised by this new turn of events. It is not unusual for the Crows to accept a second contract on the same mark, if the first one failed to be… fulfilled, but usually there is no need for a third contract."

The meaning of his words settled heavily in her guts, but she tried to shrug off the uneasiness with a laughter. "Well, as you said not long ago, let the Crows bring it on." Flashes of their wild night together after the coronation went through her mind, full of drunken sex and unspoken promises, but his expression was unreadable, once again. "Zev, if you don't want to stay I under-"

"No, you do _not_ understand!" he growled, jumping from the chair and taking her by the shoulders. "There has never been a third contract, not even on _royalty_! This is a serious matter, Elissa, and you should not laugh at it. The Crows know by now that you are a very difficult mark, and they would never accept a second contract if they were not certain of success. It has to do with the fear in which they shroud themselves. Should they fail a second time, their reputation will be severely damaged." He let her go and turned around, pacing in front of her desk while she stood there, frozen. "They must know something we do not, a means to get to you… Something gives them the certainty that they _will_ kill you, otherwise they would not have embarked on this mission."

"But you said it would have been fun…"

"If they came for _me_, Elissa, not for you!"

She shut up, feeling stupid and childish. He looked worried, as much as she'd ever seen him be, since the end of the Blight, and angry. She had never seen him angry before, not with their companions, not with _her_.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, not knowing exactly what for.

He stopped in his tracks and went to her, raising his arms as if to embrace her, but at the last moment he slowed down and simply put his hands on her shoulders. "You have nothing to be sorry about. It is not your fault."

She felt a pang of sadness when he restrained his movements, but tried not to let it show. "I'd like to know who's behind all that. Would it be useful if we discovered the client?"

"Maybe," he said, the grip on her shoulders softening. "But this is not important now. We have to leave Denerim as soon as possible."

She let out a breath she wasn't aware she was holding. He wanted them to leave together, at least. She felt her eyes prickling and blinked the gathering tears away before he could see them. _Andraste__'__s ass, what__'__s gotten into me? _"And where should we go?"

"Amaranthine would be the ideal choice. Everyone knows you are going to visit your arling…"

"It's the Grey Wardens'…"

"… very soon, so they will not be surprised to see you leaving." He took a step back and nodded. "Well, it is settled then. We will leave tomorrow at dawn."

"But a delegation from Orlais is expected for tomorrow, I really can't…"

"What is more important? That delegation or your life?" He didn't wait for an answer. "We will tell only Alistair, and him alone. No one must know the real reason for our departure. You should start packing while I settle a couple of things, now."

"But Alistair…"

"He will manage. He will protest, naturally, but he will understand. He cares for you, very much," he added, almost as an afterthought. "Maybe _I_ should break the news to him, yes?"

She nodded slowly, confused about the whole situation. Before she could voice any question, she heard a knock at the door to her sitting room. She opened it and saw that a servant, an old woman, was laying out their breakfast on a low table. It was a breakfast for two, with her orange jam and Zevran's favourite _panini_. She hadn't required breakfast _for two_, but it seemed the cook didn't need to be told. "Anything else, M'lady?" the woman asked, when she finished.

"No, thank you."

The woman curtsied to both of them and left the room just as Zevran went to sit in front of his plate.

"The palace servants are certainly aware of our… arrangement," he said with a hint of amusement in his voice, "so we can assume that the notion has spread out by now. In everyone's eyes it will be only natural for me to come along when you leave, yes?"

She blushed and nodded, looking into her cup of tea. _Fergus will hear rumors about us. I wonder how he__'__ll take it._

She heard Zevran chuckling. "For being a noblewoman, raised in one of Ferelden most ancient and respected families, you are so easily embarrassed. It is always a pleasure to see you blush, though." He had spread some of her orange jam on one of his _panini_, and was now offering a piece of bread for her to bite. She smiled, amused by his constant flirting, then put her hand upon his and bit away some of the bread.

He smiled wolfishly then. "Look at you, all brute force and no finesse. You have jam on your face. Here, let me." He rose from his seat in front of her and moved around the low table, catching her chin with his free hand. She watched him as he slowly leant down to lick away the jam from the corner of her mouth, then closed her eyes and held her breath as he kissed her more fully on her lips.

When he drew away slightly she instinctively followed his lips, then felt him smiling against her cheek as he spoke. "Always so eager, hmm? One would think that _you_ have fallen for _my_ charms."

She opened her eyes, pulling back as though she had been physically _hit_, but she didn't see any mockery in his eyes. Before she could speak, he took her fist and opened it, pushing something into her hand. She looked down at her hand then, seeing a shiny golden loop with a green gem set in it. "Your earring…" she said, marvelling at the sight of his favourite jewel.

"Yes. It has a history, you know. I acquired it on my very first job for the Crows. A Rivaini merchant prince, and he was wearing a single, jewelled earring when I killed him. In fact, that's about all he was wearing." She looked at him and he grinned. "I thought it was beautiful and took it to mark the occasion. I've kept it since, and I'd like you to have it."

She felt her heart jumping in her chest, but she didn't dare hope for too much. "It's beautiful, but… why are you giving it to me?"

"Must I have a reason to give something to you? You gave me these marvellous boots, and the Dalish gloves… But if you need a reason, then here it is: I owe you a great deal. My freedom from the Crows, for instance."

She looked at the earring in her hand, trying to smile and failing terribly. "So… you give me something so important to you, just to… thank me?

"It is not so important, after all. It is just a shiny bauble. I value my freedom much more than that." He sounded a bit annoyed. "Am I not allowed to give you a present?"

"Zevran, it's not like that. Of course you can, it's just…" She sighed, searching for the right words. "I had hoped that… Nevermind." She took his hand in hers and put the jewelled earring back in his palm. "Please don't be offended, but I can't accept it. No on these terms."

He looked very annoyed. "You are a very frustrating woman to deal with, do you know that?"

She swallowed the lump in her throat, unable to answer, and he misinterpreted her silence. "Fine. You don't want the earring, you don't get the earring. As simple as that."

He closed his hand and went back to his seat. They sat, unspeaking, Zevran eating his _panini_ in an offended silence and Elissa looking down at her cup of tea. She felt moisture gathering in her eyes. _Again, _Maker_! You must stop acting like a child, you__'__re a grown woman! What are you going to do when the Crows catch up with you? Cry in their faces?_

She straightened her back and got up, ignoring her untouched breakfast. "I'd better start packing now. See you later?"

Zevran nodded curtly without meeting her eyes, then muttered something to himself. "_Merda! Darei la vita per lei, e lei cosa fa? __Non accetta neanche un maledetto orecchino!_"

Elissa suppressed a moan of frustration as she went back to her bedroom. _I really should start learning Antivan._


End file.
